This Movie Can Make It

A "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" Review

(The Review opens up in the Family Room of Bryce Kanyon's house, with the host decorating The Christmas Tree. As he's decorating, Bryce Kanyon hums "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" to lighten the mood. After placing the last ornament on the tree, one that looks like a "Red-Nosed Reindeer", Bryce turns around to discover that he's currently on the air)

Oh, hey everyone! I apologize; didn't know we were on. I'm Bryce "The Wrestlemaniac" Kanyon; I view it and review it because I'm crazy enough to do it. As you can guess, I'm actually doing some last minute Christmas Decorating with Christmas arriving in less than a week. You know, just a few days ago I was out singing some Christmas Carols with my sister and her friends and apparently this was the only song that we were mostly singing during our trip (Well that as well as "Frosty the Snowman" and "Jingle Bell Rock", they didn't know how to sing "It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Year"). Then an idea hit me, since Christmas is almost here, I figured this would be the perfect time to discuss one of my all time favorite Christmas stories and that is based on the song I was singing.

You know, the story of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" has been told in so many different perspectives. From radio broadcasts to storybooks and even on the media like television, movies, and, of course, Broadway shows (Though I honestly don't know a stage company that did it to use as an example). One of the most famous companies to perform the story of Rudolph is Rankin/Bass Productions, a company whom you may know for all their Christmas specials and even "The Last Unicorn", one of my all-time favorite animated features. Now if you're guessing that my next review is going to be a Rankin/Bass movie… To your surprise, that's not the version of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" I'm reviewing for a variety of reasons. But the main ones being: That would be a movie that's been reviewed to death and it's too predictable for a critic to do. So instead, I decided to review a movie I consider to be underrated, underappreciated and yet still a timeless Christmas movie for anyone growing up as a kid. Some people have compared this version to the original for years and I've decided to accept the challenge of reviewing this flick and determine if it still holds up as a childhood classic. Released on October 16th, 1998 the movie is "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Movie" (No really, that's what it's called).

The movie starts at the North Pole, we are given a glimpse of the landscape of the film and I actually prefer the animation of this opening segment as opposed to the original. In a way, it's like looking at a painting if you take a good glimpse. Anyways, Santa Claus and his wife see what appear to be the Northern Lights flying in the sky. Actually it's a quartet of Sprites foreshadowing the story of Rudolph through the title song itself. Speaking of Rudolph, we are introduced to him as the son of Santa's reindeer, Blitzen (Not Donner from the original Rankin/Bass version), and his wife Mitzy, played respectfully by Gary Chalk (The sheriff from "Freddy vs. Jason" and Scorby in "The Fly II") and Debbie Reynolds (Whom you may be well familiar with as the leading role in "Singin' in the Rain).

Well at least the mother in this movie actually has a name instead of being referred to as "Mrs. Donner".

After the parents give the new born deer his title name, I just get over how cute the little guy is, a small accident turns into a big problem when they discover that Rudolph has a shiny red-nose. Well to me it's not really that surprising since Rudolph's nose was already red in the first three minutes or so kind of like the original. After discovering this, there is only a few words that Mitzy can say upon this discovery:

Mitzy: Bless you.

Heh, that's actually kind of funny because in one way that's what we would usually say to someone who just sneezed but in another way it kind of refers to Rudolph being "blessed" with a red nose… Yeah I don't know if that was really that funny.

Anyways, after cut with the theme to "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer"… Again, we are once again introduced to the Sprites: Aurora, Sparkle, Glitter, and Twinkle. Now hold on! Why didn't they just introduce themselves in the opening segment in the first place? Least they would've served as kind of the narrators of this movie. Sighs… But then it would've been too much like the original in some ways, so I guess that would be understandable. Now before I lose track, Blitzen and Mitzy show Rudolph around the North Pole when his red-nose becomes the center of attention to the members of the sleigh team and the elves, both embarrassing the father and teasing the poor little buck.

You know, there's a difference between a playful tease and then just being… Mean. And these deer are supposed to be Rudolph's "uncles" for Christ's sake… Role models for the North Pole my butt!

Blitzen and Mitzy try to express some reassurance through song, but unfortunately that seems to make things worse when the rest of the North Pole keeps bringing up his Red Nose. Okay we get it! He's got a Red Nose; don't you have anything better to worry about? They better be lucky that it's Christmas or I'd have a reason to get out my shotgun… And that was not a joke people.

We soon cut to a scene featuring the mail-carriers of the North Pole, Doggle and Boone, played respectfully by Alec Willows (Never heard of him) and Richard Simmons, you know the really weird work-out guy you wanted to see get run-over in that Bridgestone commercial:

Richard Simmons: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

I really wished that guy had run him over; that would've made that commercial even more funny.

Anyways, they were just driving down the North Pole to deliver the mail to Santa when they accidentally crash into Stormella's ice-sculptures after a mishap on the bridge. Who is Stormella you might ask? Just wait until the next couple of scenes and you'll soon see an antagonist who's going to be really mad when she finds out who destroyed her garden.

Meanwhile, Blitzen and Mitzy continue giving Rudolph a tour through Santa's workshop, where all the elves are busy making the toys for Santa to deliver through song. Now as for what I can say about this song, it's not that bad though I'm not sure this song would be considered catchy. And is it just me or does there seem to be more female vocals than male vocals used on this song. Anyways, by the end of the storm, trouble bursts in as we are finally introduced to Stormella.

Stormella: All right, someone's on "deep ice".

Well at least it's better than Arnold Schwarzenegger's puns.

Mr. Freeze: Ice to see you!

God Joel Schumacher, why?!

Anyways, this Ice Queen, voiced by Shenzi herself, Whoopi Goldberg, is really mad that two of Santa's elves wrecked her ice sculptures, so mad that every elf in the factory quivers in fear (Though how an elf is able to fit in a toy house is beyond me). After finding out which one of the elves did it, Stormella demands Ole Saint Nick to hand them over. But when the big man refuses, Stormella vows that the next elf, deer, or even Claus who crosses her bridge, which she declares is closed-off forever, and Stormella will unleash the biggest snowstorm that the North Pole has ever seen.

Stormella: I am talking hail, I am talking sleet, and I am talking snow in a windshield that will knock your thermal socks off baby!

Dang this woman is really serious about that snow thing. Talk about foreshadowing in this movie; least we get an idea how the blizzard comes into play. In fact, this woman is so serious that she's willing to wait a long-time until the day it does happen.

A year after that confrontation, Rudolph has since gone to school with the other young deer, or yearlings in this movie (Better than being called "Furlings"), as they discuss about Santa and getting on his Reindeer team. As it's revealed, Santa holds a series of Junior Reindeer games where each one gets the opportunity to shine in front of the Big Man in Red and depending on who demonstrates the best characteristics in courage, valor, and a pure heart, Santa picks that deer to join his team. Well at least the Reindeer games actually served a major purpose in this movie instead of just being regular in Rankin/Bass' movie. This segment also gives us a chance to introduce some of the other characters in this movie, from Zoey, Rudolph's love interest, and Arrow, Cupid's son and rival of Rudolph…

Wait a minute! If Cupid is supposed to be one of Rudolph's uncles and Arrow is Cupid's son… Does that mean they are cousins in this movie? Well, least that seems to give Arrow more character than Fireball. But man what a jerk this Arrow dude is for when Rudolph expresses his wish to be on the sled team he has to be a buzzkill and bring up Rudolph's red-nose. He even gets the whole class on his side, with the exception of Zoey and the schoolteacher, making Rudolph the laughing stock in the whole classroom. You know, students like these deer make me SICK! But then again, it makes me feel bad for Rudolph as we can sort've relate to our experience in our school years when our students used to tease us for the stupidest reasons… I mean REALLY stupid people and yet we continue to do it anyway… Why? Why? WHY?! Then again, that's stupid kids for you.

Reindeer with Glasses: HEY!

It's the hard truth pal and you're going to have to live with that after this movie.

Feeling disheartened, Rudolph runs away from the school and decides to hide out in the snow until Ole Saint Nick notices the troubled little buck. Oh, did I forget to mention John Goodman plays Santa in this movie? You know, James P. Sullivan from the "Monsters Inc." movie and it's upcoming sequel? P.S. I am hoping that film turns out to be a good sequel unlike…

(Shows poster of "Cars II")

NO! GET THAT OFF MY SCREEN!

Okay, anyways Santa and Rudolph have a pep talk about Rudolph's problems and why Rudolph thinks everyone won't allow him to be on his team because of it. Out of everyone in this whole movie, Santa actually expresses how everyone is different on the outside and that what's more important is what's on the inside. Now I knew that John Goodman was as talented as a singer as an actor, but he really explains the message in this song so well. Makes me wish that more people could be more acceptable of others just because we are different whether it be because of our height, our physical features, the way we dress, our hobbies, or whatever. Just because we have those differences, doesn't mean we are any less human beings or Reindeer in this movie.

After that touching number, wee see Santa Claus preparing his lift-off to deliver the presents to all the children and the reindeer are given a role-call before take-off. And wouldn't you know it, it's during this portion of the movie where we hear a familiar tune you hear on the radio. You'd be surprised how many songs like this have been featured in a feature-length film. Now I don't know if this was a song made for the movie or if they figured it would be the perfect song to use for this portion of the movie. But nonetheless it seems like a appropriate choice for this song. After Rudolph gets to see his father take-off on Christmas night, Rudolph takes this time to daydream of the day he can be a flier just like his father. But in the midst of his little speech, Zoey overhears his mention of her name of those he wishes to 'thank' and expresses how she wants to be friends with Rudolph in-spite of his nose. The two lovebirds find themselves under the mistletoe and were just about to go in for the kiss.

(Scene shows Rudolph about to go in for the kiss as Bryce Kanyon leads forward from his chair anticipating with excitement).

Voice: HEY! WHAT'S GOING ON!

(Scene switched to a mad Arrow confronting Rudolph & Zoey, much to Bryce Kanyon's disappointment).

DANG IT! Ruins everything! As it turns out, Arrow is in love with Zoe as well and is easily jealous that a girl like Zoey would want to hang out with… God I'm going to hate myself for saying this… Rudy the Red-Nosed Reject. It's barely a half hour into this movie and so far all I've heard is insults from these people! Son of Cupid my butt, he doesn't even have the star on his forehead and I'll be surprised if no one thought of that before. But as it turns out, Zoey shares some feelings for Rudolph as she looks back at him. Well, it looks like this buck's luck may slowly start to turn.

As the movie shifts to another few years, they really don't say how long, it's the day of the Reindeer games as Rudolph, Zoe, and, god forbid, even Arrow, have grown into their teen years and are ready to compete for the attention of the big man in Red. Not much has changed with these characters besides different voice actors portraying them. From Kathleen Barr portraying Rudolph, to Myriam Sirois portraying Zoey (Though from what I heard she hasn't done as many roles as the other actors in this movie) and the role of Arrow as portrayed by Ed, from "Ed, Edd, N Eddy", a.k.a. Matt Hill (Wow, guess that explains how stupid Arrow's character is for the most part). But you know, for some reason I keep thinking Rudolph sounds like Ash Ketchum for some reason, seriously compare some of the voice work of Ash to Rudolph you can almost tell they are similar. But moving on, these reindeer prepare for the first game of the day: The Sleigh Race. Now this is a rather interesting choice for the movie. Because listen to this part of the lyrics from the song:

"They never let poor Rudolph join in any reindeer games".

But look, Rudolph is clearly competing in at least "one" of the games. Then again, he was doing the "Take-Off" in the Rankin/Bass production, though I mostly thought it was just practice for the actual games or something. Anyways, the race gets underway and Arrow clearly shows no hesitation to resort to dirty tactics to win the race. Course, those tactics are putting all the elves and their reindeer in jeopardy. Well, it's a good thing this is a kids movie or someone could've really gotten hurt. Speaking of getting hurt, Arrow tries to steer Rudolph straight into an abandoned sleigh. God, I can't bear to watch (Covers his eyes).

(The scene shows Rudolph running towards the sleigh, a look of determination in his face and then… He takes a dramatic leap over the sleigh as the audience watches in awe).

Rankin/Bass Santa: Not bad; not bad at all!

Couldn't have said it better myself. Everything seems to run smoothly for Rudolph until Arrow's taunting and bullying really goes too far. After trying to deceive Rudolph about how Zoey really feels towards him, Rudolph's anger causes his nose to glow, blinding Arrow, and knocking him off course. Ah, don't you just love it when karma bites back at bad seeds? Rudolph ends up winning the sleigh race and the crowd goes wild for Rudolph…

(A loud whistle interrupts Bryce Kanyon, who turns to see what's wrong)

Referee: You're disqualified for an illegal use of a red nose!

WHAT!!! Are you blind ref? Okay, maybe what Rudolph did was wrong but did you not see what Arrow was doing 2 minutes ago?

Referee: You're banned from the rest of the games.

SON OF A… (Stops himself and takes a deep breath) Okay, okay… Calm down Kanyon. Okay, so Rudolph got screwed out of the games. But at least the deer who came in second wins the race, so which means Zoey…

Announcer: The judges rule… Arrow winner by default.

WHAT!!! But… He didn't… Zoey came in… But… (Takes deep breath) One moment.

(Bryce steps out of his room and closes the door behind him. Then, a series of yells can be heard outside the bedroom before it starts to settle down. It's not long before Bryce Kanyon finally steps back into the room but the frustration on his face is painfully obvious)

These games are freaking rigged! Arrow was cheating the whole time this game started, the judges failed to notice that, and he still wins! And on top of all that, if anyone besides Rudolph should've won, Zoey could've been that deer. She came in second; she worked just as hard as any of the competitors in the race. And if you look back a few scenes, you can clearly see that Zoey was in second place… AND NOT ARROW! What are these North Pole people feminists too? Could that explain why all of the reindeer on Santa's sleigh team are all men? If that's the case in this dimension, I feel sorry for the boys named Vixen and Cupid and only one of them barely gets more than one line in the whole movie! But you know what? It was painfully obvious being on Santa's sleigh team was never going to happen for Rudolph! Because the obvious truth is: Nobody in that freaking village likes him… BECAUSE OF HIS RED NOSE!!! And sadly, not even Santa can change such an unfair decision. The Big Man in Red, the one who determines who's naughty or nice, the head hauncho of all of the North Pole, and the one everyone looks up to and he can't change the decision the judges made! Final decision my butt!

But thankfully, Zoey agrees that Arrow did not deserve to win and this race was the last straw. Arrow may have emerged victorious, but ultimately he loses his real "trophy" Zoey, who abandons the miserable buck for good. Meanwhile, Rudolph overhears an argument between Blitzen and the Referee, who unintentionally lets it slip that Rudolph's red nose was an "accident". Okay, I'm sorry Blitzen but I have to lay it flat… That was the worst possible you could ever say! Is being deaf an "accident"? Or blind? But more importantly, is being freaking autistic an accident? No, an accident is when you drop a bucket of popcorn on someone's head in the movie theater. An "accident" is when someone's like, "Hey, are you stupid or something?" when it turns out that person has a low self-esteem! This is as FAR away from an accident that you can possibly get! And unfortunately, Rudolph takes it the wrong way and decides he would rather run away from his home then spend the rest of his miserable life being teased and bullied because of his red nose. As night crawls in, we once again break into a song; only this time, it's a duet between Rudolph and Zoey. Now I have to admit this is a beautiful duet song, probably one of my favorite songs in the whole movie. But at the same time, it's a rather sad number with Rudolph traveling alone with no one to turn to while Zoey sings about her longing to be with Rudolph and it's clear she loves Rudolph as more than just a friend. In fact, this song almost makes me want to cry just listening to it.

As Rudolph continues to wander the wilderness, the Sprites use their magic to point Rudolph to a nearby cave to take shelter. Though, I must question: Why couldn't they just try to convince Rudolph to go home? They better have had something planned for Rudolph with a tactic like this. Tired, Rudolph decides to rest in the cave till morning when he meets Eric Idle, or in this movie: Slyly the White Fox. Wait? An English actor, who at the time played an insane mouse in Secret of NIMH 2 (Which I thought was a terrible sequel) and one half of a conjoint Dragon in Quest for Camelot ends up playing a street-wise Brooklyn toned fox. Heh… Least it's better than ripping off a "Pinky and the Brain" character. Anyways, this fox tries to get Rudolph out of his cave but as you can tell from how it's going…. It's not going well.

(Slyly charges towards Rudolph, who steps back as Slyly runs straight into a wall).

Wow… Fail. (Shrugs as a "Wah-Wah" tune plays)

Slyly: I'm a… Just warming up.

(Slyly grabs a hold of Rudolph, who just kicks him off and hurtling him backfirst into the wall).

Okay, it was the funny the first time now it's just getting annoying (Sighs as he shrugs to the "Wah-Wah" tune again).

(Slyly runs along a wall, lands on Rudolph's back, and tries to make Rudolph say uncle. Instead Rudolph keeps running until Slyly hits his face and says uncle. The "Wah-Wah" tune plays again, and Bryce shrugs only to sprain his shoulder)

OW! Shoulder cramp… (Rubs his shoulder for a bit then sighs). You know buddy, just because you're tough doesn't mean you're capable!

Finally, Slyly gives up after the third freaking attempt and decides to let Rudolph stay in his cave. So apparently they are friends now? That's a weird way to make friends; then again, I've seen worse. So Slyly figures out that Rudolph ran away after his parents and friends seemingly turned his back on him and Rudolph couldn't take it anymore. Wow, that Slyly guy either has been in that situation before or he just had a gut feeling… How much can you bet I believe it's the former? Anyways, Slyly reassures Rudolph that the worst can happen besides being running away by breaking into a random number with a female fox quartet and… WAIT A MINUTE! Where the heck did they come from? One song later and they just pop out of freaking nowhere! What did they have some secret female fox club or something? And you know something? After this song ends, they never speak about it again. So that must make this another…

Random voice: BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!

Right… But apart from that, I actually like the moral of this song. I mean when you really think about it, there are worst things that can happen to us whether it's being teased or getting an F on a test or even getting an ensemble role in a play. When the song ends, Slyly discovers Rudolph's glowing nose and Rudolph fears that Slyly will just laugh at him like everyone else. But somehow, one little joke from Slyly actually makes Rudolph feel better as it turns out all the seemingly rude cracks everyone says about Rudolph actually turns out to be funny. Now that I think about, when it doesn't sound mean or rude, the jokes are actually hilarious when you look at it another way. Heck, even Rudolph laughs at his own insults. I guess all that stuff his friends and family may have let slip might not have been as worse than I thought. After the song, we discover a recurring gag from Slyly: He likes to sleep with a Teddy Bear (Or in this case, one of Rudolph's personal belongings) and apparently sucks his thumb when no one is looking. I kind of understand the whole pride ting this fox goes through, it's like how some boys liked "My Little Pony" before it became really popular today but back then we kept that locked in our closets for sometime (Those who grew up actually watching "My Little Pony Tales" especially).

Speaking of his friends and family, Blitzen and Mitzy find out that Rudolph ran away from home and inform this to Zoey, who came over to visit Rudolph. While Mitzy is clearing upset about it, Blitzen on the other hand… He actually seems calm about the fact his own son ran away. I mean… Dude! You're son ran off because of all the way everyone treated him like a pile of trash and you're not even the least bit concerned your son could get hurt or worse! In fact, the only one who seems determined enough to find Rudolph is Zoey, who decides to run away as well with the intention of bringing him back home. Well at least someone in that town cares deeply enough to want to find him. You know I'm glad someone is taking action and I think I'm going to do the same. If you excuse me…

(Bryce stands up from his chair and hurtles himself straight through the television and into Santa Claus' house. Everyone there gasps when they see Bryce arrive onto the set as he steps forward to speak)

Mr. C, I've been a spectator throughout this movie for too long and I finally had enough!

Reindeer: The boy literally jumped through the screen!

Elf: What magic is this?

Look everyone, I know I'm not really supposed to be in this movie so my opinion might not matter in this universe but here it goes. Everybody, nothing personal, but if anyone should've been on the sleigh team, Rudolph should've been considered in the first place. Rudolph had all the character and heart the team needed and you all were crazy to not realize that.

Arrow: Why would we have let that red-nosed freak have a chance to be in the sleigh team? So he can blind the man on the moon?

(Most of the elves and deer are laughing, with the exception of the Claus', Rudolph's parents, and even Zoey's. Bryce Kanyon sighs and turns his face to the T.V. screen)

Adam Sandler and Legoland1085, if you read this review, please forgive me for doing this; but this has gotten way out of hand!

(Screen zooms out to show Bryce Kanyon playing a guitar and breaks out in song)

Everyone in this room has been associated with Rudolph,
Who is cute, cuddly, sweet, gentle, nice, friendly, good at heart,
And most loved by children
I'm guessing ninety-nine percent of you have either laughed at Rudolph's nose and
Calling him names all because of some stupid logic of being like all the other deer to be in the sleigh team
But the next time you'd see him he'd still go out of his way to smile and
Let you pet him and talk to you or something like that because he unlike
Us actually cared about some one other than himself
But the real reason I bring this up to you is because I am the most relatable of all
My life seemed to be going nowhere
Till I learned Rudolph's story represented my side
We worked hard and should've had a thank you
Instead growing up proved our roughest ride
Like him, I was an outcast
But he'd never quit on me
Till I watched him run off alone
Because everyone called him freaky

Reindeer with Glasses: Once when we were in Reindeer school
And it felt like a regular school day for me
Rudolph was in our class that day
As we discussed our dreams to fly for all to see
And when Rudolph spoke up
Arrow brought up his nose and laughed
We ended up laughing at Rudolph
And it had made him cry; we just don't know why!

Elf Referee: I was the referee in the Reindeer games,
For the first game Rudolph succeeded was the sleigh race
When his red nose caught Arrow off guard I said, "Rudolph is disqualified"
And told him he was banned right in his face

What a crushing blow to Rudolph
I bet you wish you could take it back (Referee nods sadly)

Mrs. Claus: How could you all be so mean to Rudolph?
Sounds to me like you are all on crack!

(One of the elves tosses a bag to the one next to him, who glares back in response)

Mitzy: I wanted Rudolph to be a flier to show that we care
But the first time he really needed us we weren't there

Blitzen: And on Christmas Eve and the last night of Hannukah

It's just not fair!

Elves: Bum biddy biddy bum bum
Bum biddy biddy biddy bum

Reindeer: Bum biddy biddy bum bum
Bum biddy biddy biddy bum

I wonder if Arrow ever sounds like Ed from "Ed, Edd n Eddy"

(Everyone turns to Arrow, who takes a deep sigh and says…)

Arrow: Yes.

Everyone: Bum biddy biddy biddy bum bum
Bum biddy biddy bum

(Suddenly, while everyone is really getting into tune, a thought jumped into Bryce Kanyon)

OMG! I forgot about Zoey and Rudolph!

(Bryce Kanyon jumps right out from the television screen and gets back to doing his review)

So apparently, Santa Claus is convinced that Rudolph and Zoey need to be recovered, so he gives Doggle and Boone another chance by sending them out to search for the deer and bring them home (Hopefully they won't let Mr. C down like last time). Meanwhile, Zoey has apparently spent the night searching for Rudolph and goes to great lengths to look for him… Even crossing Stormella's bridge when everyone was forbidden to cross it. As it turns out, Stormella spent all those years keeping an eye on that bridge. Makes you wonder what she did to handle her bathroom needs. Anyways, Stormella and her crew corner Zoey, preventing her from escaping by… Did Stormella just pull her wand straight from her… Okay, moving on! Stormella makes Zoey her prisoner and prepares to unleash her storm to bury Santa Claus and all the North Pole citizens. Luckily, The Sprites witnessed the whole thing and rush off to find help. If they're reason for not helping Zoey escape has nothing to do with Stormella's magic being too powerful, don't bother with excuses.

Meanwhile, Rudolph & Slyly deal with their own problems when, for reasons unknown, a cave-in strikes and the entrance is blocked by a huge pile of snow. Well it was either getting blocked off or trapped in a cave. Hmm… Yeah, I'd rather freeze outside where at least there's food a few feet away. So the duo decides to find a new cave, which they find out is the home of a Polar Bear. Though this has always bothered me, if this bear lives all by himself then why are there two chairs? Explain movie, EXPLAIN! Slyly tries to trick the Polar Bear into leaving through a cave-in scam; unfortunately, that con only seems to make it worse. It's only when Rudolph tells the bear the reason they went into his cave in the first place and prove that telling the truth actually works better than lying. Gee, if that's so easy to do then why does everyone keep doing it? I never know.

In case you didn't catch on, Bob Newhart voiced the Polar Bear, or Leonard as he refers to himself in this movie. But I have to criticize his character in the movie, while at the same time apologizing to Bob on this. Of all the great roles he did in his career from Bernard the Mouse in two of Disney's well-known films, his role in "The Librarian" movies (Yes people, I actually watched those movies), and even an Elf in the movie "Elf", those are good examples of his finest work. But in this movie… Let's just say the role of Leonard is as comparable as Larry in "The Three Stooges". To me, Leonard seems like the character doesn't really stand out from the team, as seen more as a follower than someone who does anything truly significant. In other words, he just seems kind of there to support Rudolph and… That's just about it. Now with Yukon Cornelius from the original film, at least he did more than just follow Rudolph. This is the guy who freaking fought the Abominable Snowman with his bare hands! In the thirty seconds they actually start communicating, we don't really get a chance to learn about Leonard or his character or why he seems to live alone. This movie never gives Leonard a spotlight moment and even if there was, it just "barely" makes a mark. Bob Newhart I am really sorry for this role but I can only hope you found something from this experience you enjoyed.

Anyways, Rudolph decides to take a walk out the cave after a nightmare involving a montage with memories of his dark childhood. Wow, they really take Rudolph's conflicts to great measures in this movie. Just then, Rudolph finally meets The Sprites of the Northern Lights after nearly half of the whole movie and learns that they have watched over Rudolph for years, admiring his nose. Okay… That's kind of an awkward way to start a conversation don't you think? They also reveal that Zoey has been locked away in Stormella's castle and only Rudolph's light can save her. So they teach Rudolph how to use his nose properly until he finally learns how to control his power. Well, why didn't they just try that in the first place could've saved Rudolph a ton of trouble… But then this would've been a "very" short movie.

And so, Rudolph and his friends cross the bridge to Stormella's castle (Or in this case, Rudolph & Leonard, since Slyly seems too scared to want to help). I'll give credit for Leonard in this scene; at least he knows a secret entrance to get into the castle. Maybe that explains how he got all the fancy furniture and stuff in his cave, theoretically speaking. After traversing around the castle, Rudolph & Leonard make their way into the catacombs of Stormella's castle but end up going in circles looking for Zoey. It's only after Zoey starts singing that they are able to find her and try to free Zoey. Unfortunately, Stormella was already aware they crossed her bridge and locks the two in the other cells with minimal effort. I swear at least in Rankin/Bass' movie Rudolph put up a fight before he was in a tight spot! Stormella then reveals she has unleashed her storm to cancel Santa's plans to deliver the toys to the children as told through song simply titled "I Hate Santa Claus". Okay, I definitely know for a fact that Whoopi Goldberg is a talented singer but this movie really wants this actress to be scary. I mean, she doesn't just wants to cancel Santa's trip but she hates Santa to the point where she'd want to hurt the big man in red! All seems lost for our heroes as Stormella appears to have won and our protagonists blame themselves for allowing this to happen. On the other hand, at least Rudolph & Zoey finally express their true feelings for each other before… The end.

Voice: See what happens when you lead a rescue mission to amateurs?

But no, it turns out their rescuer is none other than Slyly, who had a change of heart and decided to come into the castle to save his friends. Slyly ends up going into Stormella's bedroom to remove the key from her neck and somehow when Stormella wakes up he literally tells her he's stealing the key to the dungeon and… She goes right back to sleep. Wow, Stormella is probably the dumbest Ice Queen I've ever seen on television. Nonetheless, Slyly frees his friends and they make their escape. It is only afterwards that Stormella FINALLY catches on to Slyly's plan and pursues the prisoners. Gee that took her what a few seconds? Rudolph and the gang manage to get out of the castle only to find themselves wedged between the edge of a cliff and Stormella's crew. But just as Stormella is about to turn Zoey into an icicle, Rudolph puts his nose to good use and Stormella finds herself holding on for dear life. Hmm… If I were to choose between saving the woman who threatened to ruin Christmas and turn us into popcycles or let karma take it's toll and let the woman fall… Oh screw it, we know Rudolph is too warmhearted for something that cruel. So Rudolph saves Stormella from falling to her doom, with the help of his friends, and as a reward for saving her Slyly reveals Stormella must now grant Rudolph a wish for saving her life (Something to do with "Code of the North Pole" or something). In other words, Rudolph can wish for anything he wants: Money, getting a regular nose, or…

Rudolph (To Stormella): I want you to be nice.

… Really? You sure there's nothing else you would rather wish for? After all, you only get one wish and one would think of something bigger than…

Rudolph (To Stormella): I want you to be nice.

Oh come on, don't you want a taste of being normal? To be treated with a little respect, for those neigh Sayers to finally be put in their place, and to be loved by all…

Rudolph (To Stormella): I want you to be nice.

Oh what the heck Stormella, just do it already! So Stormella hesitantly uses her magic to make herself "nice" and… She doesn't even look entirely different. I mean same wardrobe, same blue skin…

Stormalle (To her Butler Penquin): Awwww, cute little penguin.

… I believe her. So not much has changed on the outside, but I suppose the biggest change in any individual comes from inside where it matters the most. Unfortunately, even with this wish, Stormella can't undo the spell that caused the storm. In other words, that wish seemed to be all for naught. Ah well, at least Stormella won't be any trouble to Santa now that she's sweet and kind, allowing them to use her bridge as a shortcut and… How the heck are Rudolph & his pals even going to make it back home in that storm? It turns out, Doggle and Boone have been searching for them ever since this portion of the film started and Rudolph uses his light to guide them back to the North Pole. Well done you two, this certainly makes up for all the trouble that happened years ago. They make it just as Santa Claus is about to cancel the flight and this inspires a great idea for the Big Man. All that leading to the most famous line in the whole story:

Santa Claus: Rudolph, with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?

And wouldn't you know it, Rudolph "Finally" gets an opportunity to help Santa Claus and uses his nose to guide the team safely through the storm, Rudolph's friends receive some Christmas presents (Even an Ice Statue for Stormella), Blitzen is finally proud of his son, and the movie ends with "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" for the third time in the whole movie.

And that was "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer: The Movie"; what did I think of it? Well, in-spite being comparable to Rankin/Bass' movie and how annoyed and frustrating it was to see Rudolph mistreated by nearly everyone in the North Pole… I actually loved this movie.

Everyone: Huh?

Call it a guilty pleasure if you like, but to me I consider this movie a worthy adaptation to the classic story we all grew up. Sure it's not as memorable or famous as the Rankin/Bass version but the movie doesn't try to be anything like Rankin/Bass. Sure there are characters in this movie who share some similarity to the Rankin/Bass cast, but the movie always seems to find a way to stand out on it's own. For unlike the Rankin/Bass production, this movie actually goes into great detail about Rudolph's childhood and the struggles Rudolph endured all the way to his teen years. We never really get to learn how bad that was in Rankin/Bass' movie; we just assume it was a rotten childhood experience. Then there's the fact that Blitzen is Rudolph's dad instead of Donner. Whether or not the fear of plagiarism had something to do with it, there's never anything canon in regards to Rudolph's family (After all, this movie was grateful to give Rudolph's mom an actual name). But probably the major difference is the villainess of the movie, Stormella. Personally… I think she's a much better villain than The Abominable Snowman!

(A series of boos can be heard blown towards Bryce Kanyon as he tries to keep some order on the set)

Okay… All right, settle down… Okay, okay, okay… I get it… Come on… HOLD IT PEOPLE! Let me explain. Yes I know growing up The Abominable Snowman was the big scary beast who tried to eat Rudolph in his family. He's even been listed as one of The Scariest creatures in the Animated World… At least according to a certain Toonmoore kind of guy. A big scary beast ravenously devouring everything that has to do with Christmas. That's really the problem: The Abominable Snowman is just an animal living by pure instincts. To me, he doesn't really seem to be against Christmas and he doesn't try to spoil the holiday. He's just some big ape wanting to eat any elf, reindeer, or god knows what else if they cross into his path. Plus, after he gets his choppers pulled out… He's not even all that scary; he's more like a huggable gorilla when he's not thrashing you about. Now as for Stormella, true to her name she actually causes the blizzard to ruin Christmas after someone crossed her bridge. Plus, she's got a pack of artic wolves on her side and even her own loyal Butler. Course she reforms later in the movie, but three-forth of the film features Stormella bitter at Santa and the elves, despising everything that has to do with Christmas, and doesn't care what happens to her prisoners so long as she gets "justice". Talk about an ice… You get the idea.

All and all, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Movie truly keeps to the spirit of a holiday classic. Even though the movie has been comparable to the Rankin/Bass film, it truly shows how anyone can do anything when they set their heart to something. The actors do a great job of portraying these characters, although some could've been developed properly if the film didn't have a deadline to make. Even though most of the music is not memorable, with the exception of "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer", they are still enjoyable songs to listen to and there is at least one song that will have your heart soar. Yowza! Animation does a pretty decent job with the animation in this movie and this film was the first theatrical feature from "GoodTimes Entertainment", and that's saying a lot for a company known for their home videos. It's not the best adaptation to the movie but we can still find so much to appreciate for a movie that keeps to the spirit of the true meaning of Christmas and how we as an audience can relate to the problems that Rudolph has to go through. So without further ado, I give this movie a passing score of 3 ½ stars out of 5.

Oh, in case you didn't read my journal, I decided this week is going to be a "Double-Feature" week. Which means, as compared to all the other times I reviewed films, I'm bringing a special guest with me to review the second movie I plan to do this week. I won't tell you which film it is, but I guarantee it's a movie that's fit for the holidays. I'm Bryce Kanyon, I viewed it and reviewed it and now if you'll excuse me (Starts dialing on his cellphone) I have to make a few calls.

(Calls a number until someone picks up)

Hey Hewy, this is Bryce Kanyon. I was wondering if..

Hewy Toonmoore: No!

(Bryce hears the phone hang up) Well to heck with you. Heh, this could take a while folks but luckily I might know an even worthier critic for the job.  

Until next time, happy holidays!